The You in Me
I still hear the you in me – in how I pause before punchlines;
crush my knuckles like bubble wrap when I’m embarrassed;
stab my fork through beds of arugula, scraping against the bottom of the bowl (instead of
gingerly plucking the eager, arched leaves on the top).
There’s a stench to this shapeshift,
saturating black cropped tees, accessorized with
cat hair,
pearls,
and flaky tracks of dried spicy mayo.
I speak slower now, but stammer over simple words. Chraboirled. Mimomsa. Pealse. Paleese.
Please.
I say, “It do be like that,” instead of “So it goes.”
And it’s a relief to be new, even if I’m worse – a patchwork of plagiarized mannerisms. It do be
like that, sometimes.
Never fear (love)! I’m not in you anymore.
Someone else is there, in your new, symmetrical smile – and inside your silence.
Claire Holahan is a New Orleans-based writer who passionately explores the little laugh behind fear and grief. She has been published in The Atlantic, HelloHorror, The London Reader, The Bookends Review, and more.